“Parliament of owls”? Ri-i-ight. “Murder of crows”? Barely with you. “Loveliness of ladybugs”? Now you’ve lost me. So random. Bonkers!
Fuck for Life!
Persons that have successfully recovered from COVID-19 disease now have specific antibodies in their blood and other bodily fluids which provide at least some level of immunity against recurrent illness. Transfusion of the plasma harvested from recoveries has already proven as a quite effective measure to boost one’s ability to fight off SARS-CoV-2 pathogen at the gates. In a short while overloaded health care systems around the world won’t be able to provide medical assistance to the masses and people will inevitably look for ways to strengthen their unprepared immune systems in all sorts of DIY styles that may be considered wild, weird and even crazy by some prudes. Since the antibodies can be readily found in bodily fluids, the only real alternative to healthy lifestyle, very much unattainable plasma or illusive vaccine is to have lots and lots of diverse and unprotected sex with a willing COVID-19 recoverie. For the common folk like me and you it’s the only realistically accessible way to get at least some protection against the virus. Status of the COVID-19 recoverie will be the most coveted and sought after on the dating market in the coming months. The best pick up line in 2020 in a no-brainer. Please update your Tinder tagline accordingly!
That awkward moment when you search for the biography of Louis XVI of France but browser’s autocomplete knows you better…
That moment you realize you aren’t hikki you’ve just been your whole life in a voluntary quarantine!
You’ve Got Mail
Didn’t quite get your piece of the action hoarding toilet paper at the mall? No worries, mate! Just remove the sticker on your mailbox that says: “No junk mail, leaflets and menus, please!” and your crapper will be all set up for the foreseeable future!